Board Chairman

All of that above is what the bean-counter HR department wants to hear but is only a fraction of why you want to hire me. I will never lie to you. I take ownership of my mistakes and make right, uncompelled to cover my butt. Sure the education proves that I can warm-body a class for paper which is to consistently show up on time, do the work within deadline, and encourage a team environment. It is the chauffeur position I held while finishing school while raising two infants while my wife worked in the head office of Farmers Insurance as secretary for the Chief Attorney which proves that I can safely follow the rules without complaint in precise punctuality, independently like a farmer - without supervision and capable of rectifying any situation or failure in the field, to achieve five-star guest satisfaction with style and class to become, with all the humility of a servant, the most requested Livery operator in Beverly Hills - a celebrity to celebrities if you will. Turner Computer Software as the Year 2000 loomed demonstrates my power and adeptness to lead a difficult team harmoniously without argument under extreme pressure. As a street magician talent and street smarts helped me to crate the LightBringers Project then be elected Mayor of Buskers in Pasadena, to learn to live happily in poverty, for the scrappy strays at the animal shelter tend to prove to be the most brilliant stars. Like Obi Wan - I never owned a droid by I digested the manuals - my carefully cultured online footprint shuns TicTok, the Meta twits, et cetera. I am well versed in utilizing social media and choose not to, for if you are not purchasing the product, you ARE the product, which I carefully limit with deep regard for my privacy - I can exploit them just fine yet not be exploited. I have not yet tried a job I wasn't good at and I have yet to meet any employment agency hack who could truly understand the position to be filled, nor recognize the rough diamonds best suited to fill them.
Prove me wrong.